Top Ten Reasons to be a Dad

I am not a dad, but I do have one. And in the 34 years of knowing my Dad, I’ve learned why he chose to be a Dad-along with a few other things, like:

Duct tape fixes everything, even flip flops.

But, here are the top ten reasons that I think my Dad became a dad.

1. You can pretty much wear anything, if you’re a dad. You might even hear, “Oh, that’s just my dad.”

2. Mustaches look sleazy on most guys, but if you have a wedding ring and your toting around 4 kids, you can get by with it.

3. You have the right to embarrass your kids-because, after all-you can punish them if they make fun of you.

4. You finally get to say, “Don’t make me turn this car around!”.

5. When you become a dad, you automatically know how to carve a turkey, change the oil, fix a garbage disposer, change a diaper and make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Or not.

6. You always get to say the prayer at the dinner table, making it as long-winded as you want.

7. If you are awesome-like my Dad is-your kids will grow up to think you are the most amazing father in the world. And they will tell you often. And visit you. And call you. And hug you.

8. But, even if you are awesome-you will also hear a lot of stupidity out of your children as they grow up. Because, let’s face it. Kids are stupid. But, since you’re awesome, you remain calm, pray for sanity and spank on.

9. You get to say, “Because I said so”, and “Because your mother said so.” You prefer the first, but will use the latter if need be.

10. You get presents on father’s day, including-but not limited to: licorice, updated clothing items, bar-b-que gift certificates, hand-painted art projects, perhaps a reenactment of your life put on in a dramatic form complete with costumes, and socks.

Who wouldn’t want to be a dad? Happy Father’s Day, Dad. I LOVE YOU!

Happy Father’s Day

I have the best dad in the world. You may argue with me, but you’d be wrong. Dead wrong. (Alright, you can have the best dad, too. This isn’t worth arguing over.)

Today, I would like to say thank you to the man that raised me, protected me and provided for me. And, I would like to honor all of those other dad’s out there that are diligently doing the same.

Thank you Dad, for playing with us kids and always pretending to be “hit” and then pretending to be “hurt” and then pretending to “die”.

Honestly, I really thought we had conquered Goliath-you were that good of an actor. Now, I know you were just humble enough to let a sassy 6 year old in pigtails take you down.

Thank you Dad, for giving us shoulder rides all over Europe when we were little and then all over Kansas when we were really too big to be given shoulder rides.

You have always taken a lot on your shoulders as the man of our house. And, you’ve never let us down.

Thank you Dad, for idolizing the right men-God, Jesus and MacGyver. I know MacGyver is the only reason you carried your Swiss Army knife wherever you went and the reason behind the enormous amount of duct tape found in our house.

You had your priorities straight.

Thank you Dad, for laughing at appropriate times and at the most inappropriate things. Like when Grandma toots or when I show off by burping my name.

And thank you Dad for loving us all the same (although I have a feeling that I’m your favorite girl) and for teaching us unconditional love. I’m sorry about keeping you up at night when I’d go on a date with the that kid with the mohawk or the one way too old for me-but because of you, I knew exactly how to defend myself if need be. Thank goodness it never came to that…

Thank you for accepting Biceps immediately because you knew he was the right one for your baby girl. You were right about that and about so many other things.

You aren’t perfect, but you are perfectly my dad and I love you and I am so proud of you. Happy Father’s Day.

Men Make Such a Difference

My Father was the man that told me stories every night, held me when I cried, and who could barely spank me when I was naughty. (Which was often).

He taught me that a man worth having…was a man worth waiting for.

He took us kids on bike rides, crafted stilts out of leftover wood and created ‘treasure hunts’ for our birthdays.

He’ll still be silly with us and has never embarrassed by us.

He is reliable, consistent, honest…

…and a little weird.
Mom says that’s where I get it from.

He is the best earthly example I have seen of what my Heavenly Father must be like.
Except I picture God with flowing hair. My Dad has never had flowing hair. I believe he came out of the womb with his current hairdo.
Anywho, thank you Daddy, for showing me what it means to live a godly and moral life.
I love you more than you’ll ever know. Happy Father’s Day!