What Biceps Does to Worry Me

I know I shouldn’t worry, but it’s that danged thorn in my flesh. Don’t shoot Bible bullets at me-I realize I have a problem. I know the things to meditate on, I know what to confess.

I know, I know, I know.

Biceps decided to leave a somewhat safe 11 year-long career to pursue firefighting. Don’t get me wrong, there were the occasional lightening storms during outdoor festivals, whiteouts while driving across North Dakota, bloody knuckles from smashing his bass guitar against an amp and the most dreaded thing of all-scantily clad groupies.

But he chose to become a firefighter and I supported him wholeheartedly. I was ecstatic that we would be home more often, knowing that I could go to church on a more regular basis. That I could be present for birthdays, births and bar mitzvahs. That I didn’t have to be surrounded by stinky boys.

However, this is what I am getting used to now.

I now hear tales of structure fires, trailer fires, Hazmat situations, donkey kicking doors in, medical emergencies and the like. I want to be tough and pretend as if I would like to hear all about it.

But imagine your loved one fighting a chemical fire while being weighed down with 50 pounds of gear in 108 degree temperature. This is how Biceps makes me worry.

This is when I grab my aged Bible and look for 1 Peter 5:7, “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” I think this will be my mantra for the rest of my life…or at least for the rest of Bicep’s fire career.

The X Factor and Britney Spears

I had the rare opportunity to spend this past weekend solely with my little brother, Daniel. (Although, my little brother is not that little. At 6’2″, he pretty much dominates any sort of crowd situation.)

Daniel, a.k.a. “Average Dan“, works for Fox television here in Tulsa and was sent to the X Factor auditions taking place in Kansas City.

And wouldn’t you know he asked me to go along with him? I felt so stinkin’ special.

As kids, Daniel and I traveled to the most exotic midwest small towns with my parent’s ministry. We became so accustomed to traveling the back roads that now traveling on interstates seems almost sacrilegious.

We still appreciate 2 lane highways, slower speed limits, weird sightings such as the world’s largest prairie dog, ball of twine or pen collections, roadside fruit stands, and cowboys hanging out the DQ.

We chose the circuotous route, stopping in Coffeyville, Ks. to act like morons and climb all over this train and relive old memories.

We learned long ago that even in the tiniest town, most mexican restaurants offered edible food. If there isn’t a mexican restaurant to be found, Plan B was always chicken fingers. You can’t really screw up either of these food sources, for the most part.

So, we stopped for mexican in Iola, KS and ate at El Charro’s. It did not disappoint.

After a quick change at our hotel, we walked to the Sprint Center to watch the X Factor auditions. The place was packed, the emotions were high, the weirdos and the talented alike stepped on and then off stage.

The judges were Britney Spears, L.A. Reid, Demi Lovato and what should have been Simon Cowell but ended up being the British X Factor’s judge Louis Walsh. I was concerned Britney might freak out and jump on the table, or threaten someone with an umbrella, but she was rather composed and gentle when it came to crushing someone’s dreams.

I saw three promising vocalists out of the 10 or 15 that tried-a 40 something year old male who went country, a 12 year old R & B female that blew us all out of the water, and a 16 year old chick with pipes that tore the house apart and then down.

We speculated what Britney was doing while we were eating fish tacos and drinking a dark beer. I just hoped it didn’t involve her hair, a razor and crazy pills.

But, it probably did.

Did you know? Get to know Potholes….

You may be a relatively new reader here at Potholes and Pantyhose. Or, you may have suffered with me through the Iweb times. Or, you may be here for the first time and wondered what the heck you were doing here.

You may have decided you wanted to create me…

…married me, grew up with me, go to church with me or have never met me (much to your benefit, I’m sure). But, here you are, reading about me, learning who this weirdo is, as if I matter.

But, there are a few things you may not know about me or my life. And, maybe after this post, wished you didn’t know. Just in case you want to feel a little more normal today, did you know that:

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The sound of a crow cawing makes me sad.

Click on the “Photo Source” to hear the sound for yourself. You be the judge. Happy or sad?

My husband has an altar ego on myspace (of all ridiculous places) named “KrunkTymeK“.

We had a house that blew up.

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If attending a large function, I tend to color coordinate people-meaning I rearrange people in my mind so that they “match” their surroundings. Thus the reason I tend to sit on the first or second row in order to not be distracted by my freakishness.

I am licensed to drive one of these, and did so for David Copperfield (yes, the magician with gigantic eyebows), the Flaming Lips and other “famous” people. They all still have morning breath just like the rest of us.

We were told that Cowboy was a “Cowgirl” until we went to get “her” fixed. God rest his/her soul.

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I almost died choking on one of these when I was a stupid kid.

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And last, but certainly not least, clowns freak me out for obvious reasons. I mean, seriously. Come on.

I am missing “it”.

With change comes remembrance-at least for most, but usually not me. My memory is unpredictable-at best-and I have three theories about the why behind that:
#1-My mother dropped me on my head when I was an infant.
#2-My brothers convinced me to hold my breath until I passed out, doing permanent damage.
#3-I was born in an Army hospital in Landstuhl, Germany. Need I say more?

With my faulty memory comes the need to reminisce via digital photos of bygone years. Today, as I scoured through old photos, I realized I was missing “it”.

And, here is what “it” is to me:
An excitement about life-a hopefulness for the future-a knowing that there is something amazing right around the corner.

This photo was taken shortly after selling one of our commercial properties, the Denver House.

Biceps and I were on our way to Europe for an entire month-just the two of us. I had my old manual camera-because, “By gawd, I wasn’t switching over to that new fangled digital type of photography”.

We had our backpacks, our passports, plenty of spending money and a plan.

Life was exciting. For the first time, we had more than enough in our bank accounts. Buying a car that wasn’t 15 years or more old was becoming a reality. We knew we could take on the world.

But before traipsing off to Europe, we chose to spend two weeks with both sets of our parents. We toodled around, checking out leaves, eating amazing food and just being a family.

It seemed like life was more exciting then-for all of us. But honestly, the only thing that has changed since then was my perception of life.

I was more excited about life at that time.

We still had issues. We lived in a part of town we desperately wanted to leave. We weren’t certain of Biceps’ band making it. My parent’s were seeing the end to their teaching careers and didn’t know what was next. The list goes on.

So, what I am going to do today is capture who this girl was and…

…transport her into this girl-who could stand to laugh more, to lean on God more and to realize life is what it’s going to be. And, I’d better get on board with joy.

I don’t want to miss “it” as I’m looking forward to the next “it”. Have you ever felt the same way-as if your excitement about life was missing? I’d love to hear about what you are doing to get it back.
Let’s inspire one another.