The Fireplace Incident

I was working away in my office (my office at home-what do you think-I leave the house? HA!) when I heard a distinct thump in the living room, cat claws skidding out on the hardwood floor, a rustling of some plastic substance and then–silence.

Curious, but not unaccustomed to such shenanigans, I made my way out to find the reason for the scuffle. Nothing in the house seemed to be destroyed, knocked over or out of place-this time.

That’s when my “cat-dar” went up. After much searching, I only located a very wigged out Max, hiding on the top ledge in the bathroom.

Look at the size of those pupils.

His tail was puffed out and upon further inspection, which I later regretted-was found to be sticky and wet.

Ew.

After several minutes of calling for Bianca, this little lady greeted me by the front door.

Ms. Perfect White Pants was covered in soot, head to toe.

Now, Ms. Bianca will vacate the house and hide in the dirty chimney in order to escape one of three things:

1. Kayle’s drumming
2. Small, Noisy Children
3. An unnamed source on this day in question

And the story began to unfold….

I decided to inspect the amount of soot she must have brought down with her from a romp in the chimney, and assess vacuuming vs sweeping.

If you’ll notice, in the upper left hand corner of the fireplace, there is something protruding from the chimney.

A Wal-mart bag was hanging out of, and partially stuck inside of the chimney. I had known one of my earlier grocery bags went mysteriously missing this morning.

I’m weird that way.

Secondly, the hearth was covered in wet, sticky residue-reminiscent of Max’s tail.

Upon removing the bag, one can easily see it had been ripped to shreds.

And Bianca returned to the scene, trying to cover up whatever it was she did with her little sooty paws.

Max would not join either of us for the rest of the day. He stayed perched on his ledge, with wigged out eyes if Bianca ever entered the room.

The Nancy Drew side of me wanted to know the full story. Someone knows something-but no one was talking-to me or to each other. I will just have to chalk this up to an unsolved case.